Lady Lessons: a godly employee

I recently started a job in retail about a month and some ago. I'd done other various things before, but since I had a love for clothing and helping others to feel beautiful, this seemed like a good fit. My job has me organizing things in the store, putting together outfits for women and being a smiling face that greets them and helps to make their experience a fun one.

It got me thinking about work we (may or may not) enjoy, and I was curious as to what God says about work.

Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, work at it wholeheartedly as though you were doing it for the Lord and not merely for people." 


I had to ask myself, how many times have I had a task at hand, regardless of whether or not there's a paycheck involved, where I've totally given it my all..even when it wasn't enjoyable? Kind of a tough question. Human nature wants us to just complain and whine about why it's not fun or fair that we have to do it, but God says that we should do all of our work as though we are working for him..if God asked me to do something, I know I would totally put my full effort into it. Do you do that each time your boss gives you an assignment? 


Proverbs 16:3 says, "Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will succeed."


Have you ever been set on doing something only to find out that it was really not what God had intended for you? Unfortunately, I've experienced this before, and let me tell you, it wasn't successful. Ashley recently wrote about finding God's will for your life, and there's some great advice there to help you discover some of the plans that God has for you. It all begins with submission. The first part of that verse says to Commit. That means give it all up to Him; lose control. It's so easy to hold on to things so we feel like we have everything under control, but really it's about wholehearted surrender. When it's all given to Him, God has the ability to work freely, unhindered by our faults; consequently, this is when the most beautiful and successful things happen. Isn't that what we are all striving for? 


My encouragement to you ladies is to be faithful in your job, whether or not you like your boss, co-workers or assignments. Work as though you are doing it for God, for indeed, you are! And realize that in total surrender, you will find true happiness and success. 


Candice is the stylish gal behind Teatime Thoughts. She's a lady who believes in fairy tales, loves making girls look & feel beautiful, & will give you product reviews on her Vlogs (Teatime Thursday). You can catch her on twitter too.

[see more of this series here]

Lady Lessons: a godly wife (pt2)

I saw a lot of what I didn't want in a marriage before I even got married, so I was determined to apply simple things to my own marriage one day. What I have come to value and learn the most so far is that you have to create the atmosphere of unconditional thankfulness and love, and not for one day take for granted that this person decided to spend their life with you. And I don’t even mean that in the fairy tale cliché way. In real life it's not always in the mushy gushy love notes, gifts, goo goo eyes, and dates nights. That is romance, and while very important, the core heartbeat of the partnership is in the everyday routines and communication.

The unconditional love can come from just how you react to someone when they come in the door. Understanding is an action expression of love. I try to remember to take into account the day that he had, what’s on his mind, what he might want to do to unwind and refresh for a second. Its human nature to be like: well, what about MY day and what about what I need and what I want to do? Marriage isn’t about you. When you create an atmosphere of putting them first, its only a matter of time before they do the same because they appreciate what they have experienced from you. Might take some time of pouring into that atmosphere being built, and everything might not always be "perfectly even steven" but when two people really make an effort to put each other first (well God first of course, but you know what I mean) then both are taken care of instead of competing and keeping score about who does more or needs more. Cause that's no fun, we definitely didn't want that.

Unconditional thankfulness can come from the tone and attitude of how you talk to each other too. Creating an atmosphere where your spouse feels comfortable telling you things about their day, their thoughts, or being honest without an argument starting, getting jumped at, or feeling judged and demeaned is key. Saying “thank you” and showing our appreciation once they do something we asked them to take care of, instead of reminding them how long it took them to do it with a sarcastic thank you, is something so simple but can change shift the atmosphere to remaining positive and empowering. An attitude of entitlement is the quickest way to kill an atmosphere of thankfulness.

We are their wife, not their mother or boss. I never wanted my husband to feel like he needed a break from me. Anything they do for us should be appreciated and thanked, even if it’s something you think they should do… a real thank you doesn’t hurt anybody and it will allow the spouse to feel empowered to enjoy taking care of things. I know I enjoy cooking or making sure to get his favorites things at the grocery store when I know he notices and says thank you, and means it. Instead of just acting like
because I’m the wife, I should cook and do all the food shopping...

We decided even before we got married, we would always talk to each other like Jesus himself was standing right behind the other person. Just imagine Jesus looking over your spouses shoulder at you when you're talking. Sounds almost a little funny BUT let me tell you, it creates an applicable standard of communicating in love.

Marriage is about building the other person up and being in position to carry out what God wanted to accomplish through you both coming together. Is it always perfect? No, but when you have 1000% open communication and thankfulness for each other, what could've turned into a “rough patch” can instead just be a “good relationship building discussion.” And then you move on to enjoying each other... and making goo goo eyes ;)


Ashley is the nicest and sweetest girl I've met. She loves supporting and being involved in the blogging community, growing in the Lord and speaking her heart out. When she's not doing something thoughtful and meaningful for someone, she's probably making some adorable headbands at the Luce Shop. If you're not familiar with her blog I strongly advice you to head over there and follow her. Her encouragement is priceless. Your life will be changed.

[see more of this series here]

Lady Lessons: a godly Wife

It was a hot summer day of June of 2001. I was new to church and new to the whole summer camp experience. As I was sitting on a bench hanging out with a high school friend, I saw a strange looking boy across the field. He had an afro, spong bob socks, and an amazing smile. Wow, he seems like a fun guy I thought to myself. Little did I know that that it would be that fun guy himself that would become my husband ten years later.

I have known my husband for a decade. I met him as a junior in high school, was close friends with him all through college and became his girlfriend on my twentieth birthday. Three years later I became his wife and have been married to him for a year and a half. Its safe to say that I know that boy like the back of my hand. I know how he thinks and what he likes, can predict how he's gonna react to things, and can read his body language like a pro. Having had such a solid friendship foundation, makes being married feel like I'm hanging out with my best friend all day, every day. The world, the media, and even coming from a broken home, painted the portrait of marriage to be a difficult one full of boredom, dread, and even heartbreak.

I remember being in seventh grade and feeling the weight of my parent's divorce weighing heavy on my shoulders. I feared getting married since I was completely convinced that what happened to my parents was bound to happen to me as well. However, beyond what I felt and beyond what I had convinced myself was true, I wanted to trust in God's unshakeable truth that the plans I have for you are to prosper you and not to harm you,plans to give you hope.. Jer. 29:11.

Now that I am married, I can honestly say that I am having an amazing time being a wife. Being young and married in an enormous paradox in today's society. People my age are usually perplexed when they see my wedding ring. Most people believe that I have given up my personal goals and dreams or stop experiencing the world and life itself because I "settled down." Actually, it's quite the contrary. The great part about being young and married is just that.. we're young.. and married. We can go on crazy, spontaneous adventures. We can take risks, try new things, and make drastic life-altering decisions. We have a plethora of opportunities and routes we can take and are early in the game to fix any messes made along the way. All the while, we're a team. We get to experience all that crazy, fun stuff together while being linked together by a deep, emotional, spiritual, and physical connection.

The day I became a wife, I also was being called into a new ministry. As a wife, I serve the Lord by serving my husband. I love serving Julio by supporting him, praying for him, and lovingly submitting to the leadership role the Lord has placed over him. This makes my relationship with God even more intimate since I must rely on His grace daily to fight back my sinful desires to be selfish and I often struggle with laziness.

In return, my husband serves the Lord by loving me the way Christ loves the church. Those are some profound words. Christ died for the church! I'm pretty sure that in small ways, everyday, Julio sacrifices his own desires in order to be a better husband and leader.

Through the past year and a half, I have grown so much more conscious of what God's love is truly like. I can't even begin to count the times God has shown His love for me through my husband. Even through his human imperfections, Julio's love for me is a small reflection of God's heart vast for me; of how God pursues me, forgives me, and loves me despite my flaws and failures.

Are you married or about to become a Mrs. yourself?
What do you enjoy about your relationship and how has God used it to help you grow?


There's a lot of things I like about Betsy, where do I even start? She's witty, pretty, lives on the beach and we share the same culture (Ok, so I might be biased)! But seriously, this lady is more than a wife, and you must read about it on her blog Three-20. She is one of the few bloggers that's naturally her, not aiming to please. I am constantly held accountable by her writings. Thank you Betsy!

[see more of this series here]

Lady Lessons: Blogging

Why I Blog: The Little Lessons

Why do I blog? The question occasionally drifted through my mind, and I would find myself perplexed. Still, I never truly formed an answer to the question until one day I was blatantly asked “what is blogging useful for?” one late afternoon. I realized that I literally spend hours on blog posts, writing, and trying to make my blog look appealing – but all at once I could not find the answer for, “why do I do it?”

Though the Lord still has not revealed the full answer to that question yet, He is slowly peeling away at it. I am realizing He almost never gives me all the reasons at once, but He gave me a small morsel of the answer, and I am content. You see, my blog did not begin with a solid purpose; I was, like many others, a teen looking for something fun and creative to do. I loved writing and literature, and I found blogging to be a useful outlet to express my passion for it with the occasional inspirational post here and there.

However, after two years of mediocre blog posts, things began to change. I realized that writing was something I wanted to pursue seriously: that was when my little blogging hobby looming in the background caught my eye, and God suddenly began showing me it could grow into something far greater then I could have dreamed. Once I dove in, I found myself captivated; through blogging I was suddenly able to capture all the singular, kinky moments in life that make it so sweet. Then I fell in love with photography, with DIYs, and even editing my blog’s template through HTML! It all rushed up like a torrent, but through it all I had an inward Peace.

The Lord has given young women so many unique talents. Through blogging, many gifted Christian young women share those abilities through pictures and words. However, when Christian’s share experiences through blogging, other areas of their lives cannot help but permeate through; and the amazing gospel of Jesus Christ cannot help but shine through their lives, as they write and talk and share. A wise teacher of mine once said that whatever hobby I do or vocation I work in, I will always have a ministry. Christians who are walking with their Savior and desiring to glorify Him cannot help but reflect His love in everything they do.

Whether therefore you eat, or drink, or whatsoever you do, do all to the glory of God.

1 Corinthians 10:31

Through blogs, I have continually been lifted up by the edification of other Sister’s in Christ. I have read of their experiences, have felt their pain, their joy, their victory dances. Through blogging I have been able to share those incidences and the little lessons He teaches me daily. Whenever I read about the little lessons other young Christian ladies are learning, it inspires me to pray for them, to grow more, to keep glorifying my Savior who is so ever-faithful. This is the part of blogging which makes it so very, utterly sweet. We have a connection through His Spirit, and blogging can often times bring us together into a community of people we may never meet, but we can minister to. There can be a side of blogging that goes beyond the pictures and words. I find that if I allow myself to become transparent, to talk about things of God which truly matter, the Lord is able to take blogging and use it for His glory.

When I clicked “publish” and began my blog, I had no idea that it would bring me down this adventurous road; and though I still do not fully comprehend why I am blogging, I know that I have a strong love and desire to pursue it which bubbles from Him. It’s my little place to write, to upload photos, to share events that are happening in my life; and the culminating joy is to share the Truth about the life Jesus Christ is offering each person lovingly, freely.

Catch Kimberly's everyday life as she enjoys her days of lovely simplicity on her blog Amusing. Her blog is an inspiration to me, a personal favorite you could say. Her blog is full of eye candy pictures taken mostly by herself.  She also handcrafts beauty and sells them at her etsy shop.


[see more of this series here]

Lady Lessons: A Godly Girlfriend

Hey sisters, I need to preface this post by admitting that I am a broken, sinful, and oftentimes messy woman who is in desperate need of grace.  I am no expert on all that is required to be a godly woman in today's world.  As an imperfect twenty-two year old earnestly seeking after God, however, I have felt Him place a specific and daunting topic on my heart for this series on "Lady Lessons".  I tried to deny it, argue it, and turn it into something "easier" - but alas, the Lord has other plans!  So bear with me as I dive into the topic of what it looks like to be a godly girlfriend.

I am sure that we all have our opinions on what a "girlfriend" is and should be.  Whether you're just a friend who's a girl or you're in a dating (or courting) relationship, there are things that are required of us as women when we're trying to spur on our brothers - or boyfriends - to be their best and most godly selves.  I have been dating my best friend for almost a year, and as stated before, I am not an expert.  I fall short in my relationship often, and may even fail him sometimes... but because of the grace of God that is lavished on the both of us, we are able to extend grace and love to one other.  And I am learning how to be a better and more godly girlfriend as a result.  So allow me to share with you 5 things I believe that we should possess and exercise, first in our friendships and ultimately in our dating relationships, with men who are seeking after and fighting for the Lord.

Respect.
Just as women desire to be loved, men want to be respected.  To be respected is to be admired, and men want to be admired for who they are and for what they do.  A big part of respect, from what I have seen and learned, comes in the forms of both private and public support.  In private, respect him by letting him know how proud you are of him!  Proud of him for being the man that he is, for showing compassion to others, for standing up for his faith in the Lord, whatever!  In public, always speak highly of him and, in moderation, express your fondness of him to others, so that they too know what a wonderful guy he is.  You have the power to build him up or tear him down.  Support and respect your man!

Patience.
Patience is probably one of the hardest things to come by in today's society, as most of us are quite used to instant gratification.  But in your relationships, patience is necessary - and no, we can never have enough of it!  When you become close to another person, it is easy for frustrations to come out more easily in that relationship.  They may become your "safe place", which can be a great thing... just be warned that you do not want to abuse this place of safety!  Impatience, or a tendency to become easily irritated or provoked, can ruin an otherwise wonderful relationship.  Take a step back, breathe deep, and maybe even bite your tongue.  Ask yourself, "is this worth it?"  Sometimes it is; other times, we need to learn to throw off our pride and admit that the relationship is more important than the issue at hand.  Something that we agreed to in my relationship is that, if/when we argue (because yes, fights happen!), we hold hands while we do it.  Why?  Because it often keeps us from playing the blame-game, getting snarky, and/or raising our voices.  It requires us to be patient, and it reminds me that he is someone I care deeply about and do not want to hurt with my words or actions!  Learn to exercise patience!

Encouragement.
Now, I don't know about you, but I thrive off of encouragement.  Whether it's comes in the form of a handwritten note, a surprise gift, or a simple word of affirmation, when I am encouraged by others it literally makes me happier.  I love it!  And guess what?  So do men!  We encourage our girlfriends all the time, don't we?  "I love your hair", "You are such a great singer", "You have a beautiful heart" all help our sisters to keep going; so what make us think that men don't need some encouragement of their own?  You can take notice of his physical appearance (because most men are just as concerned with how they look as we are), one of his many talents, or the way that he treats his family.  Whatever it is that you admire about your guy, encourage him in that.  In my opinion, there is no such thing as too much encouragement - so please don't hesitate to affirm and compliment him.  Encourage your man!

Selflessness.
It is so easy to be selfish in our relationships; to focus on what you want, what you need, what you think and feel.  A relationship, however, is about more than just self.  It is a coming together of two, independent persons who are choosing to invest in one another and in the relationship because they think that the payoff may be worth it!  Learn to be selfless - to be concerned with his needs and wishes more than your own.  Recognize, too, that a relationship is a two-way street; he should also be learning selflessness as a result of being with you.  When two people begin to shed their selfish needs and wants and focus more on the other person in the relationship, sacrificial love comes to life - and that, my sisters, is a beautiful thing!  Be selfless in your relationship!  (Note: on the flipside, however, make sure that you do not allow a man to walk all over you or expect you to submit to him in all things.  Some men may try to use - or abuse - Scripture to prove his point that you are biblically required to be completely submissive as a woman.  If this happens, be cautious!  Talk to him, check out the Scriptures, and refer to a pastor or counselor... and whatever you do, never allow any man to dismiss the fact that you are God's daughter who was made for a bigger purpose than to just adhere to his wants.  We submit to a higher Authority, ladies!)

Prayer.
Never underestimate the power of a praying woman!  We should be constantly on our knees over the men in our lives.  If your boyfriend is fighting to do God's will and glorify His name, don't doubt for a second that the enemy will want to attack his efforts to serve the Lord!  Pray for him in all aspects of his life: in his family, in his place of work, in his studies, in his ministry, in his friendships, in your relationship, and - most importantly - in his seeking after God.  Prayer is probably the greatest way that you can support your guy, and the prayers of an earnest woman will not go unanswered!  Prayer is our best weapon as individuals, and in our relationships can only make us stronger.  Be a woman of prayer over and for your man!


And of course, in all of this, we must be first seeking after the Lord ourselves.  We need to finding our confidence, affirmation, and worth in Christ and Christ alone, allowing the confidence and security from our most important relationship with Him to trickle into our other relationships.  When your relationship with the Lord is first in your heart and mind, everything else seems to fall into place according to His will!

I hope that this post has inspired, encouraged, and possibly even convicted you - I know it has me!  As a godly girl-friend of girlfriend, what would you add to this list?

For an additional resource, click here!

Gennean is the pretty lady behind the blog Loved, Not Lost. She has been called to speak to young girls by living a life of holiness, surrendered to her Lover. Her posts are always encouraging and inspiring. I'm happy to have discovered her, she's truly a gem!
[see more of this series here]

Lady Lessons: Immediate Obedience

"Jen, go clean your room!" my mom instructed. "Can I please have a few more minutes?" I'd plead. Eventually I stopped asking for her to wait, because every time I did "immediate obedience" was her reply. Needless to say, she said "immediate obedience" a lot with 6 kids! She explained to me more than once, that postponing her requests wasn't really obedience at all. I needed to do it when she asked.

Well, I've been learning the same thing in my spiritual life recently. Lately God has called me to do certain things and like my mom, He wanted me to obey His call. When He speaks I can do two things: obey right then or wait for a little while. Though I am often temped to wait, God's word makes it pretty clear that waiting equates rebellion. Think about Jonah...he thought that God couldn't really ask him to go to Nineveh, so he didn't respond to the call. After spending a while in the belly of a fish, he did what God wanted. But was it obeying? Not really. Even thought Jonah thought God was crazy for wanting to spare the people of Nineveh, God's ways were higher than he could comprehend. It's the same with me.

Since January, God has been teaching me immediate obedience. He has given me tasks and directions that seem huge and crazy, but every time He has proven that He knows what He's doing. He enables me to do His will. He called me not to buy clothes, shoes, jewelry or anything like that for 9 months, He called me to work on a project that turned into Compassion's Cry, and then He told me to quit my job. In everything He wanted me to take a step of faith and simply obey Him. It's been pretty scary sometimes, but in every instance He has made it all work out better than I ever imagined.

Who would have thought that my mom's little saying would prove to be so profound later in life...



Jennifer Blair is a pretty lady full of a heart that seeks and thirsts after God. Whether it's worshiping God with her voice and guitar or keeping us accountable through her Difference Project, Jennifer reflects the qualities of a godly woman in all aspects of her life (including her marriage). Jen will be going on a missions trip to Ethiopia soon and she's selling some gorgeous headbands to raise money. Needless to say, go check Jennifer's blog out!
[see more of this series here]

Pretty Lady

Lady:  a polite name for a woman.

One of the promises the Lord has graciously given me is found in Proverbs 31:25. It's actually the ground this blog is rooted on. I became a lady the day He revealed to me what I was created for. It often happens that we ask "Who am I?" before asking "Whose am I?". If you don't know the designer, you won't understand the design. The design assigned to me, and many others, was the role of a woman. One I didn't get to choose but a gift from the Lord nonetheless. Elisabeth Elliot said, "In order to learn what it means to be a woman, we must start with the One who made her." A truth that sets us free. It's been 7 years since I've known Whose I am and through those 7 years I've also learned what I, as a lady, have been made for.

The Lord has given me a task to share with you what I've learned through those years, though there is still so much to learn! I recognize there is a big need for mentorship out there and God intends to use this as a vehicle of mentorship. I've invited some other godly ladies in for the ride to share their lessons too. I hope you enjoy the Lady Lessons Series.

This is for you, from God's heart to your lady heart. Prayer requests and questions will  welcome through my email & formspring. Do not hesitate to do so. I look forward to taking each request & question to the Lord (as my commitment to you) and responding with truth. The lessons learned will touch every aspect of a woman, from singleness to marriage, from being a daughter to being a servant int he house of God.
Let's walk the path together to become the woman God is calling us to be. That when the call is heard, Who can find a virtuous lady? (Prov. 31:10) God will look down and smile at us; the virtuous lady is a God-fearing woman (Prov. 31:30).